The local police regularly park a patrol car on the forecourt of the petrol station 100 yards away from my office. I assume this is to deter naughty people from stealing petrol and whether or not it works I don’t know. No doubt the Freedom of Information Act will reveal the statistics. Last week another patrol car was parked in the bus stop outside my office and sat there for a few days. Yesterday I emailed local plod and asked if they were missing a panda car, because surely they wouldn’t have 2 deterrents within 100 yards. Aside from the usual “out of office back whenever” standard reply, the only possible clue that it was read by somebody came in the form of the car vanishing 2 hours later. Not only that but the one in the petrol station also vanished. So the big question is whether crime is about to spiral out of control in the 100 yard stretch of Sedgley Village. Old ladies are terrified and children are paralysed by fear.